slenclerman:

reasons to date me:
-i can pick stuff up with my feet sometimes
-ive never killed a man (yet)
-i once got 95% on guitar hero
-you can play with my hair
-im cheaper than a puppy

(via this--too--shall--pass)

all i want is to get in a fight with a guy and scream at him to shut up and then he’ll push me roughly against a wall and whisper “make me” 

(Source: beauutyispayne, via wesniall)

supermegafoxyawesomehotnot:

teruteruhanamura:

im fucking cryiNG OH MY GOD???? THIS GUY FROM SHREK

IS CALLED LORD FARQUAAD RIGHT??? AND FARQUAAD SOUNDS A LOT LIKE FUCKWAD WHEN U SAY IT

LORD FUCKWAD

HOW DID THAT ONE SLIP PAST

SAY IT WITH AN ENGLISH ACCENT

(via carpe-diemawordfromthewise)

excalilbur:

things i can’t imagine:

• someone having a crush on me
• someone thinking about me during random times of the day
• someone getting butterflies by thinking of me or talking to me
• someone wanting to talk to me but doesn’t, thinking they’ll annoy me
• someone thinking i’m genuinely cute and wanting to kiss me
• someone wanting to date me
• someone falling in love with me
• someone
• having
• a
• crush
• on
• me

(via carpe-diemawordfromthewise)

deanisanactualprincess:

cassjaytuck:

SOME NIGHTS I STAY UP WRITING AN ESSAY THAT I SHOULD’VE STARTED THREE WEEKS AGO

am i the only one who heard that as a parody of some nights instead of just reading it

(via carpe-diemawordfromthewise)

goddammitfenton:

if you ever feel bad about yourself, just remember this one time in my english class, we were writing horror stories and one of the girls wrote “it was friday the 13th, the night before halloween” for her opening sentence

(via carpe-diemawordfromthewise)